If they don't ask, don't tell

There is a nugget of wisdom that I frequently choose to forget, or else I have not yet appreciated it enough to follow it: don't give unsolicited advice, however good or appropriate or timely it may seem. It is neither desired nor heeded, and worse yet, it delays its worthy acceptance because the hearer has already heard it before -- at the *wrong* time. Why is it the "wrong" time? Simply because it wasn't *sought.*

For, "seek, and you shall find."

I always wondered why it just wasn't laid out for us. Why do we have to seek for it? Is this some kind of a joke God plays on us, hiding the nuggets of wisdom we need to get through our life and lessen our heartaches?

Because I know every time I really made any small leap of faith that increased my understanding -- I know every time I really learned something, a true *heart* lesson -- it was when I was willing to *give up* what I thought about it before, and truly open my heart and mind, and seek *truth*, letting the chips fall as they would. Because sometimes the truth is not something we want to face: it is uncomfortable and exposes our faults. Indeed, it seems the very reason we have to seek it is because the seeking is the action one takes when she is ready to face truth, come what may, and whatever the consequences may befall her ego in the process.

But sometimes -- I am ashamed to say this -- I am proud of my knowledge ("knowledge puffs up", inflates one's perception of himself) and see an opportunity to share it with someone whom I believe can benefit. Of course, this is ridiculous, because my knowledge is really puny, and nothing to be proud of in the first place! Secondly, it is ego-centric to see the situations of others always in light of one's own experiences. However similar, there are always differences, many of which are not known because we do not know someone else's internal world.

On the other hand, I do believe that others *can* benefit from some wisdom we've learned through our life experiences, but this only really builds up another when it is guided by the divine. And the Divine tells us, "seek, and you will find", and, "ask, and you will be answered."

So, if I am loving someone else, why would I presume to answer a question that hasn't been asked? I cannot.